2008 Woodie Awards
President Bush, can I be your friend?
David Ashby
Issue date: 10/28/05 Section: Opinions
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As college students, we are always told
by our elders that hard work, perseverance,
and a good education will open the doorway
to money, power and prestige. To hell
with all that nonsense, I've found a much
simplier way to the top of the economic
and social spectrum: become close friends
with President Bush.
I've discovered in recent weeks that with
the president on your side, you can rise to
any position in the country, regardless of
experience, qualifi cations, intelligence,
competency, or even tendencies to break
the law. It's cronyism, and it's been running
rampant in the Bush administration.
For those who don't know what cronyism
is, it refers to what happens when bosses
give important jobs to their unqualifi ed
friends or family.
It is why Haliburton's stock prices have
doubled since the Iraq War. It is why 18-
year-old high school dropouts in Chicago
have been hired as building inspectors who
earn $60,000 per year. It is why you will
never get promoted to manager, because
that job is reserved for the current boss's
son who never comes to work and smokes
weed all the time.
In recent months, cronyism in the federal
government has become a hot-button
issue. Take Hariet Miers, please. She was
nominated a few weeks ago to replace
retiring justice Sandra Day O'Connor on
the U.S. Supreme Court. Both liberals
and conservatives are baffl ed by this
nomination.
While most people were expecting Bush
to nominate somebody whose conservative
views could make Pat Robertson wet his
pants in fear, they still expected that person
to at least have some experience as a judge.
That's right, Miers never served as a judge,
yet she has been nominated to the highest
court in the land.
Don't get me wrong, Miers has
accomplished a lot of things in her lifetime.
She graduated from the second best law
school in Texas, she was the fi rst woman
by our elders that hard work, perseverance,
and a good education will open the doorway
to money, power and prestige. To hell
with all that nonsense, I've found a much
simplier way to the top of the economic
and social spectrum: become close friends
with President Bush.
I've discovered in recent weeks that with
the president on your side, you can rise to
any position in the country, regardless of
experience, qualifi cations, intelligence,
competency, or even tendencies to break
the law. It's cronyism, and it's been running
rampant in the Bush administration.
For those who don't know what cronyism
is, it refers to what happens when bosses
give important jobs to their unqualifi ed
friends or family.
It is why Haliburton's stock prices have
doubled since the Iraq War. It is why 18-
year-old high school dropouts in Chicago
have been hired as building inspectors who
earn $60,000 per year. It is why you will
never get promoted to manager, because
that job is reserved for the current boss's
son who never comes to work and smokes
weed all the time.
In recent months, cronyism in the federal
government has become a hot-button
issue. Take Hariet Miers, please. She was
nominated a few weeks ago to replace
retiring justice Sandra Day O'Connor on
the U.S. Supreme Court. Both liberals
and conservatives are baffl ed by this
nomination.
While most people were expecting Bush
to nominate somebody whose conservative
views could make Pat Robertson wet his
pants in fear, they still expected that person
to at least have some experience as a judge.
That's right, Miers never served as a judge,
yet she has been nominated to the highest
court in the land.
Don't get me wrong, Miers has
accomplished a lot of things in her lifetime.
She graduated from the second best law
school in Texas, she was the fi rst woman
